I love how the second line of each couplet complicates or shades the meaning of the first line and how the poem builds from one couplet to another, feeling a little like stream of consciousness, but also like a subtle argument. And there's a kind of movement from the solitary contemplation of work to contemplations about relationships and community, and yet at the same time the movement also seems to be from the outward focus towards the heart of things. And almost a movement from the concrete towards the more abstract ideas, but even those abstractions are rooted in concrete details. A simple form and yet it really takes you on a journey.
The "ands" work so beautifully here--great choice, Brian. Love all these intermingling layers of texture and feeling. We can't separate the difficult from the sublime, can we? Everything belongs.
I love where your poem eventually led me but each couplet is food for thought. My favorite lines “Squirrels are busy burying walnuts for winter and I only want to bring who I am to the light.”
Dear Brian ~ I love the form you've used here, with the first line of each couplet followed by the and. I read this several times, with each reading growing more pleasant than the preceding. You've vividly captured the complexities of a full life.
I love how the second line of each couplet complicates or shades the meaning of the first line and how the poem builds from one couplet to another, feeling a little like stream of consciousness, but also like a subtle argument. And there's a kind of movement from the solitary contemplation of work to contemplations about relationships and community, and yet at the same time the movement also seems to be from the outward focus towards the heart of things. And almost a movement from the concrete towards the more abstract ideas, but even those abstractions are rooted in concrete details. A simple form and yet it really takes you on a journey.
Thanks Melanie! I appreciate your careful read and commentary. I feel like I should just publish this as the “reflection” essay for this poem 💫
The "ands" work so beautifully here--great choice, Brian. Love all these intermingling layers of texture and feeling. We can't separate the difficult from the sublime, can we? Everything belongs.
We can’t…at least the sublime can’t be separated from the difficult. Though I wonder if difficult can stand alone…thanks as always for reading!
I don’t believe it can, but it definitely can seem so… far too often lately. 🙏💛
They're like an anchor or a pendulum that sways each couplet (if that's the term). Really excellent.
Thank you!
I love this, Brian. Ah, I too miss how I saw the world when I was younger. So much wisdom here.
Thanks LeeAnn! I’m enjoying your readings!
This is excellent, so well put together, and thought full.
Glad you enjoyed!
Love love love the "and" effect here, Brian. I immediately went back and read it a second time and felt that swinging moment even stronger.
Thanks Nathan!
This reads so true to life. ☀️
I love where your poem eventually led me but each couplet is food for thought. My favorite lines “Squirrels are busy burying walnuts for winter and I only want to bring who I am to the light.”
That’s one of my favs too…thanks for reading!
The grass is always greener but you still have to cut it. Thank you, Brian.
Thanks Paul!
That was beautiful! I love listening to your voice.
There are many lines I resonate with.
Thank you for sharing!
Hey, thanks! Appreciate you listening and sharing it!
Wow Brian I felt this deep. Thank you - I love your poems and listening to you read your work. It removed some cutlery from my heart
Thanks Nina, I appreciate this complement so much!
I really felt the deep emotions in each line of this poem, Brian. So evocative. So truthful. So beautiful.
Thanks Troy!
Dear Brian ~ I love the form you've used here, with the first line of each couplet followed by the and. I read this several times, with each reading growing more pleasant than the preceding. You've vividly captured the complexities of a full life.
Thanks Kim! I toyed with the “and” and ultimately decided on using it for every pairing.
Interesting couplets and much to ponder.
Thanks!
Walking barefoot brings me boyhood playing in my front yard with cronies…until street lights came on….🥹
It’s interesting. The kids will go barefoot, I almost always put shoes on. A lesson somewhere in there..